I was out with my mother and one of my sisters doing some clay painting. It's a really neat little place, you pick a clay piece, you paint it however you would like and then you leave it for the staff to fire, glaze and complete.
I chose to do a replica of a piece they had on display. I literally copied the design verbatim. As I was brushing on the third coat of paint, I couldn't help but think how inept I was when it comes to creative endeavours such as this. I was copying something. It was not my original design, and I was using a rubber stamp to put the actual design - a city scape - on the vase.
My mother chose to paint a sunflower dish and was industriously brushing away, layer after layer, to ensure the accuracy of the bowl's resemblance to the real thing.
My older sister was attempting a new technique involving to colors and some string. Very cool design. And as I sat there, brushing on a solid color, not taking chances, following the directions to the letter, I thought about all the neat things that my mother and sister had done that they'd come up with in their own minds.
Owing to the simplicity of what I was creating (read: duplicating) I finished earlier than the other two and sat and watched them paint, pondering these thoughts of my ineptitude. When the time came for my sister to remove the string, the desired effect was not achieved and she was visibly upset.
Once we left, the truth of the matter came out in the car: Sis felt that my mother and I were these wonderful creators and everything we made turned out and was beautiful, etc etc etc. Huh. No amount of consoling could change her mind.
Apparently, we both were feeling the same way. We all have our own insecurities; we all have feelings of inadequacy. We all compare ourselves to one another and feel as though we don't always measure up.
Elsie P
PS - The city scape is crooked...!
No comments:
Post a Comment